Existential Week!

It's existential week here in hmb-land. This morning I woke up in bed, panicked because I'm subsisting on the American status quo. I have a down comforter, a nice house to live in, an array of strip malls within driving distance, a fossil fuel-mobile, and 50-60 more years of life to figure out how to fill.

Life is this really unique blend of good and stressful right now. Clay is moving to Washington in about 61 days (he'll arrive approximately September 8th, job and residence are pending). I'm applying to an online graduate program. I'm editing an essay I wrote for an anthology about girls growing up in the church. I made a cheesecake.

But as Clay and I look at our lives together in Washington over the next few years, I'm tormented with complete Wanderlust...wanting to get out and go and have excitement and adventure. It's odd when the place of adventure (Washington) becomes the normal...and for this moment, at 12:17pm on Monday morning, I just want to get out and be on a beach in Fiji or snorkeling in Australia or on a peak in the Himalayas...and I want to know more about what I'm passionate about. I want to know how to fill my weekends in a way that doesn't involve hitting play on the DVD player so much.

This weekend I made a cheesecake...and some seafood linguine...and a chicken dijon panini...maybe I'll explore my love for cooking this week--create some dishes that would appeal to the well-traveled...and maybe my existential crisis will subsist for the time being.