Tuesday, January 30, 2007

I'm forsaking all fortune cookies

This was my fortune today: "You constantly struggle for self-improvement...and it shows."

Last week, my fortune said, "In love, you are practical and keep your feet firmly planted on the ground."

Where are all the good fortunes, huh? Ones that say, "A man in an armadillo costume will walk through your office door and hand you a golden pinata filled with Mint Milanos." or "Your boyfriend will be gifted Southwest Airlines' lifetime achievement award and receive free air miles for eternity." or "Unbeknownst to even yourself, you are a world class snowboarder and need only click your heels three times to become the professional snowboarder you are destined to be."

Seriously. I should get a job writing fortunes. Where do you sign up to do that?

5 comments:

MarkD60 said...

At the fortune cookie factory!
:-)

Anonymous said...

ya know, archie mcphee has some pretty hilarious/sarcastic fortune cookies. you might try looking there!

wren said...

Actually, I think your fortune cookies read more like onion-fortunes. You should try there.

suz said...

My all-time favorite fortune cookie fortune that I've received read "Someone will invite you to a kareoke party." No kidding. And guess what? It came true. A couple years later, but still...

Anonymous said...

My favorite fortune cookie said "Never smell the inside of a hat." Seriously.